best person ever

would have to be billy broome! he got me seasons 1-4 of the office as a gift for our 1yr anniversary/christmas present. we're really bad at keeping gifts til the actual time we're supposed to give it to each other so we gave each other one gift for now hehe. i was so excited :D he's sooo awesome. i looovveee the office!!! yeeeeeee!!

thanksgiving day weekend

i had been so excited for thanksgiving for likes weeks, and when it finally came...i was not disappointed. got home, the christmas tree was already up :( but it's ok bc it looked really good. woke up a little late, mama already put the turkey in, and it took 6 hrs to cook. none of us really ate the whole day until dinner, and i think that we were all getting cracky due to the lack of food in our systems haha. but it's ok bc we had sooo much food, that we all couldn't even go for seconds bc we overfilled our plates on the first go. we started watching the proposal after mostly everyone was done in the kitchen, and i thought i wasn't gonna eat any dessert, but after awhile, i started craving for something sweet so i went for some dessert...yum chocolate cheesecake.

black friday, didn't go shopping until like 11 bc i didn't wanna wake up early hehe. bought A LOT of gifts for christmas. hopefully everyone likes their gifts :D afterwards, i went back home, and then had cravings for turkey but realized that i didn't even pack any leftovers for myself..how sad :( got to go to the club with my girls and had a blast, but was even happier when billy made it once he got off work. we didn't stay long soon after thought bc billy was irritated with one of our friends so we left and went to meet up with his friends. got to go to meemos to get some mexican food before going to meet up with his friends, and when we finally got there, most of them were already ready to pass out haha. so after we ate, we hung out then headed for billy's place. didn't have a completely good night's sleep but i did have a good night ;)

next day, mostly lazed around. watched apple cup...woo go huskies! 30-0 yahh!! too bad i didn't get to go see it for reals tho..oh wells, there's always next year. when billy got back from work, he wanted to go meet up with his friends again but then i realized i couldn't find my wristlet that had my id, keys and debit card. we retraced our steps and everything but couldn't find it anywhere :'( it's ok tho bc i put a block on my card, and i'm gonna go get a new id, and i needa pay for some new keys sigh..i loved that wristlet too (it was my bday gift to myself a couple years ago)...oh wells.

today, i got to watch the seahawks win..for the most part lol. i slept most of the day again. now i'm watching the hills and gonna go eat some queso ice cream..yuuuummm!!! okies...well, this is it for now...hopefully it doesn't take a month for a new post..sayonara!

julie and julia

just finished watching this movie, after months of waiting around for it to show up online. i absolutely adored it. it made me really want to learn how to cook and to cook in general. if i had the funds, i would probably want to do just that. i think that i'm going to make more of an effort to try and cook real meals from now on...try is the key word here hehe. maybe if i can learn how to cook vegetables in a way that i could actually enjoy it, then i'd have a healthier diet over all. well here's to cooking and all those who love it :D

i don't know..

i feel like i been writing a whole bunch of sad things on here, but i don't know what else to write. it's my way of getting it out, i guess. it's not that i'm overly depressed about anything. i just haven't felt excitement lately. probably bc i always have something stuck in my head that i expect to happen, but something always trips it up and i just end up feeling disappointed. i just haven't been good with adapting to changes of plans lately; i usually can handle little changes, but even that has been problematic for me. i think once one thing goes wrong, then every little thing after just starts making it worse and worse. also i feel like i don't get as much attention from billy as i want. now that school's started, i kno we wont be seeing each other as much, and i'm scared that we'll start drifting apart. i kno this is irrational of me to say, but i can't help how it, especially with everything going on in my life. it doesn't help that when i'm at his place he's always distracted with something else, whether it be sports, his roommate, games, him always texting people. i kno that it's too much to ask for ALL his attention everytime i'm there, but it'd be nice if he did pay me more attention.

ugh...i hate being like this.

ill at ease

these past couple of days i haven't been feeling very well. well, i know that i wasn't feeling well the other day bc i was hungover from my birthday run, but today i just dont feel the same as normal. i think that maybe i'm kinda dehydrated, and maybe that's why i been feeling crappy. i've been drinking lots of water today, but i feel like it's juss going through me, and i still feel kinda crappy. i don't know what to do. maybe i'll be better tomorrow if i juss keep drinking lots of fluids. i juss hope that i'm not like this anymore by the time school starts bc that would just be horrible. i can't stand feeling like this all the time.

finally 21!

so i'm finally 21 and i got to spend my birthday with baberz at the pearl jam concert :D it was super good, def not what i was expecting..not that i had much to go off since i never listened to their music like i said i was going to hehe. but yah, i thought it was super good, and now i can cross off, going to a huge concert, in my bucket list. i did not drink at all on my actual birthday which i thought was kind of odd at first bc i used to be a huge partier and i thought that i would've gotten super wasted on my birthday, but i didn't, and it didn't seem like that big of a deal that i didn't which makes me feel good about myself :)

i'm gonna be having a 21 run though, i'm kinda scared. i haven't been drinking heavily at all for months so i know it's not gonna take much to get me plastered. hopefully i don't get too messed up too fast, bc i do want everyone to have a good time as well.

9 months

it's been 9 months since we've been official. time sure has gone by quick. we've had some ups and downs, but we've worked through most all of them. lately i've been a bit insecure about where i stand with him, and maybe i still am a little, even though i know i shouldn't be. i just feel like he forgets i'm around him sometimes and then i feel left out. it's partly my fault tho bc i don't say anything until last minute, but still, i don't know. i get over it bc he always makes it up to me, and i'm happy for that, but sometimes i wish he didn't do things like that so that he didn't have to make it up to me, but no relationship is that perfect, so i'm not gonna complain. i'm glad that our relationship is as good as it is bc i know some people who have it harder. and that is why, i'm glad we could spend so much time together, and that we had a great day yesterday celebrating our 9 months. i know we'll have more wonderful days ahead of us, and i can't wait for it all. as for the not so great days, those'll juss be overshadowed by the wonderful ones..i can feel it :)

happy 9 months baberz :D

life

it's been up and down these past couple weeks. i been sick for the past week. i've also been very insecure about myself when it comes to billy. we had a talk the other day about him and us and i think that just made me a little more insecure, but i'm getting better about it. i just really want to help him out as much as i can, but i'm scared that i might fail at it. i hope he can open up to me more so that i know what to do to help him. as for my life in general, i think that i need to open up to him as well, and not be afraid to bring anything up to him. also, i needa get out of this sickness business bc it's really killing me being this way all the time. school's gonna be starting up soon, i'm kinda nervous, but i'm sure i'll get through it juss fine....juss gotta keep my eye on the prize. hopefully this up coming year will be filled with as many great memories as this year and much more.

home

for the rest of summer. it's alright so far. haven't really done much because there really isn't much to do. i been sleeping a lot though, mostly bc i'm so tired from having to wake up early for work now. i don't mind being at home, since i get to spend time with the fam bam, but i miss billy lots....sigh....lots and lots..

work

i worked my first open to close day. soooo tired. i had to stand for the majority of the 8 1/2 hours that i was there. made a couple mistakes, but noting too horrible. billy got to come and have lunch with me on my break. saw matt and kassey there haha..that was funny bc i thought billy was with matt, but they came to the hospital separately lol. i had fun tho...got to hang with nikki a couple times and also made myself 2 blackberry italian sodas hehe.

all-in-all i think this is a great way to start out as far as jobs go. having weekend shifts helps me get used to doing everything without being thrown into a busy day right away. i'm kind of nervous about working with one of the supervisor's during th weekday soon, but hopefully i ge through it unscathed hehe. well, it's time for a nice nap before i continue reading.

getting in shape...

i think i'm gonna finally get started on that. i've been meaning to do it all summer but never gotten to it. i need to do it, so i will...starting today! ok...i will do this and i will keep at it. hopefully....pilates here i come!!!

work work work

work has been pretty chill so far. basically been training the past couple of days. i know how to work the register now, and i'm slowly but surely getting used to making drinks. i really wish i could just practice without worrying bout making the drink wrong. hmm..if only i had my own little espresso machine so i can practice making the milk right. i think that's the only thing i worry about the most. other than that, i'm pretty sure i know how to make everything. i'm also getting pretty good at doing the codes on the cups hehe.

i'm juss so excited that i have a job now!! yee!! i juss wanna keep making drinks til i get the hang of it :D

got meeself a job

so i got my first job yesterday. i'm gonna be working as a barista :D i think the excitement of it all drained out all my energy for today...soooo tired. but lookin on the bright side..i start tomorrow! wish me luck :D

5 pager

omg i can't believe it only took me an hour and a half to write my essay. amazing! i think it was because of class today. it really got me thinking bout all kinds of ideas to write my essay on, and i think i did a pretty good job at it. at first i wasn't sure what my thesis was going to be but i started writing down stuff on a piece of paper and got a page front and back of stuff written down. then i finally figured it out and started typing it up. it just flowed and it felt so good :D i haven't written this long of an essay except for once and i feel really good that i could write this one without too much distractions yeeee. as you can see, my typing for this blog has been full of run on sentences and that's because i'm now too lazy to care about grammar haha. kk thanks for reading this :D i'm juss so glad i got it done :D can't stop with the smileys hehe :D

all by my lonesome

stayed at billy's place today after class and lunch with the girls and billy because i said i'd rather be at his place than at my place for the whole day. dropped him off to work and took a nap and got some reading done before playing 1 vs 100. i was gonna see if his roommate wanted to play too, but he sounded like he was on the phone so i decided to juss play alone. after that, read a little more while watching some CSI. then i went upstairs to check fb and emails waiting for billy to call so i can pick him up after work. at first i was happy bc i wouldn't have to be alone anymore, but then he remembered that there was something going on for his friend who's gonna be leaving the state soon. of course, they were all going to a bar so i can't go with them. i didn't want to be selfish and tell billy to stay with me since i know that his friend's only gonna be here for a little longer until he'll be stationed on the east coast for a long time, so i told him to go. now that they're gone, i'm sad and lonely.

first midterm

had my first midterm of the summer today. studied a little last night and a little this morning before heading to class. for some reason i woke up super early this morning and had a hard time falling back asleep. i think, bc of that, my head was hurting a little right before the test. i tried not to think about it during the test, but i'm sure that it affected how i answered some of the questions. i left the room very unsure of how well i did.

6 months

yup, me and billy have been together for 6 months as of two days ago. we didn't really celebrate it since he had to work that day, but i guess him helping me move my stuff from kim's place to my new place and him spending the night there with me was good enough since that was the only time we really spent together that day. still can't believe it's been that long though, i guess time really does fly when you're having fun. hmm...here's a list of some of my favorite things that have made these past six months incredible:

~our first kiss...haha twas awkward bc i was shy and unsure of "us" at the moment
~our first date...my first time eating at an Indian restaurant AND i let you use my camera for that night when you went to Derek's bday thing; i never let anyone use my camera if i'm not around haha
~"is it weird if i told you i kinda like it when you spoon me?"-billy...that made me laugh inside, but i kinda do like spooning you :P
~billy the pup-he's your sub when you're not around for me to hold onto at night :]
~trips to the zoo-my family says that we're ALWAYS there, and i tell them that we're not, but really, we pretty much are. i love the zoo! except for the bug exhibit...shivers...
~game works-haha the stubborn stuffed animal worm, the jungle game, basketball, the ticket game that i got jyped the jackpot of tickets, photobooth that we had to wait forever for...good times haha
~cuddles...i like when we cuddle before bed
~sexy time...nuff said
~and i love all the little things you do that you probably don't even realize make me happy....little kisses at random times, big hugs and you holding me tight, coming to bed before i fall asleep, "miss you" texts w/o me saying it first, and a lot more that i can't think of right now haha

you're basically everything i had hoped for and more, and i hope i'm the same for you

HAPPY 6 MONTHS :D....again haha.

ending this school year

it's near the end and a lot has happened. started out kind of shaky with classes, but i started really buckling down after awhile. thanks in part to a certain someone who became a big part of my life halfway through the year. without his help, i would probably still be lost. i've finally started to find myself again since my world went topsy turvey a couple of years ago. i let myself get distracted with socializing and not enough schooling that i didn't even know what i wanted to do with my life, but now i'm starting to get back on track. i've got a lot of catching up to do now though, but it's ok bc i'm already on my way, and that's what i needed to do the most. i've found a good balance of school and socializing, and i hope that this continues on in the years to come. there have been lots of good times, and a couple of bad. there will be lots more of both to come, and i'm excited for the happy, not so much for the bad, but whichever one comes, i'll take it bc you can't have one without the other.

frustrated

today has not been a good day. i had hw due today for drama that i was supposed to do with a group. my group was pretty lame save for one guy. only one person in my group of four people emailed me back discussing the hw and we couldn't meet up so i ended up having to do most all of the assignment. i was so stressed about it bc i only had an hour to do it before class started. i seriously wanted to cry. but i got it done and turned it in and didn't really have to talk about it so it's all good. although i did bs one part of the hw bc i was hoping one of the other guys would have done it but they didn't. also, i was bringing my laptop over to my bed and dropped it. now, my A key is kinda weird when i press it and i have a tiny scratch on my screen. ugh, hopefully that's all that i have to do worry about for today.

missing you

have you ever missed someone even when you're in the same room? that's how i feel sometimes, even though we're in the same room, one of us or both are busy with other things like hw or what not. i wish we could just have a day to ourselves, no distractions, no friends to have to entertain, just us doing something together for the day, but i know that with everything going on right now, then it probably won't be happening anytime soon. i look forward to that day though, whenever it may be :)